Week 0 - The Birth!

26th December 2004

Caroline's Entry

Watching your loved one go through the pain of labour when there is virtually nothing you can do to alleviate her pain is heart-wrenching. As the labour drags on and on sapping every ounce of her energy and Christmas Day fades into Boxing day it's hard to imagine that this little baby will ever actually be born...

The first signs of labour started early on the morning of Christmas Eve. Emma's waters appeared to break so she phoned the hospital and they advised her to come in due to risk of infection. The problem with this is that she had to go through all the first stage of labour in the discomfort of a hospital ward which is not what we wanted. The labour continued for what seemed like forever, including the whole of Christmas Day.

At around 7pm on Christmas Day Emma had a contraction that didn't feel right. "Something just went pop!", she said! Her waters had already broken but this time there was a lot more. Unfortunately it was green coloured which indicated that Evan had poo'd inside of the womb. The first poo consists of something called meconium which is green. This can be dangerous for the baby if he ingested it so Emma was taken down to the labour ward to be induced. Even though we were a little worried about this meconium it was reassuring to know that this labour was really going to get underway!

Emma in the labour ward, before the birth

The contractions got stronger, closer together and more painful but there was still no real progress - no dilation, despite the induction. Christmas Day passed and still nothing. Shortly after midnight the midwife examined Emma again and found her to be dilated to a fingertip :/ She went off for her break at about 1am and said she'd re-examine Emma again upon her return and if there was still no progress she'd discuss our options with the Doctor. I heard them mention the C word (caesarean) which we were rather afraid of.

However, when examined again shortly before 3am we were all amazed to hear the words "Hello Baby!". Emma was fully dilated and the head was moving down. Great news, at last! No C-Section necessary. We waited a little while longer firstly to allow the baby to travel down further on his own to reduce the need for so much pushing and secondly to allow the effects of the epidural to wear off a little more so that Emma would be able to feel the sensations of the contractions so she'd know when to push.

Caroline with Evan a few minutes after the birth

The pushing started at 3.45 and the midwife and I both stood on one side of Emma as supports for her legs to give her a bit of help! By 4.05am Evan was born but those 20 minutes were the most emotional of my life. I had so many different emotions running through my head at a time that I found it hard to cope. Watching Emma going through all that pain was unbearable and as Evan's head began to emerge I felt an incredible sense of fear that something was wrong as he was such a strange colour. (No amount of birthing TV shows and photos in magazines helped with the shock of the real thing!) The fear was made worse when the midwife shouted that his cord was around his neck! Thankfully it took them just a moment to snip off the cord and he was out in one more push but it was still incredibly frightening, exciting, and overwhelming all at the same time.

It's an experience I will never forget and with this diary I hope that I'll never forget any of the experiences that are to come as Evan develops and grows up...

Caroline

Emma's Entry

Jump to Caroline's Entry

My experience of the birth is totally different to that of Caroline's. When I think back, parts of it are now starting to blur and I need reminding from those that were present to relive certain events. I guess the pain relief through drugs and that of my natural pain relief are part of the reasons for me not remembering it. I personally handled being pregnant and going through the labour better than I would have handled being the partner who felt completely helpless at times.

For two days I was having contractions and I really thought I was doing really well to have lasted with just the TENs machine. I wasn't at the time aware that my waters hadn't fully broken. When I was examined on Christmas Day and the midwife told me that I hadn't dilated at all I was devastated. All I could think of was that the pain I was having was obviously going to get worse. I have never been one for doing things the simple way and literally an hour after contacting my mum to tell her that she was unlikely to get the phone call to get in the car, I started having a contraction that felt just like all the others. I started to puff on the entonox and something inside went pop and all I felt was this gush. I remember hobbling to the toilet in my room shouting back to Caroline to get a midwife quick. When the midwife glanced down and saw the meconium she calmly said that I needed to get to the labour ward as one way or another this baby was going to be delivered. I couldn't believe what I was hearing, to suddenly go from being told that I was probably going to have to be induced the next morning to then having this happen was just typical of me, but I was happy that the baby had finally decided to come.

This is when things start to go a little hazy for me. Caroline contacted my mum to tell her to make her way to the hospital. My birth plan went out the window because I originally wanted an active labour and also wanted to avoid having an epidural. I had to be monitored throughout the whole labour to make sure that the baby didn't go into distress because of the meconium. The induction drip was causing my contractions to become stronger and the pethidine and entonox were not being much help at this stage. I finally agreed to have the epidural and the anaesthetist was really good, she administered the epidural really quickly allaying all my fears of the procedure. The epidural only worked on one side of my body so I needed another dose, which caused my right side to get too much. It was quite funny when my leg kept falling off the bed and I had to ask people to pull my leg back up onto the bed. I don't recall much pain after this, I was finally able to doze off (even mid-way through conversation). I'd only had 3 hours sleep over the past few days and it was all finally starting to take its toll on me.

Our wonderful midwife, Valeska

Thinking back to when the midwife went to lunch, I started to feel intense aching pains in my left buttock. It felt like the worst dead leg feeling you could imagine, everyone thought it was really funny and in the end I had my epidural topped up because it was hurting continuously. I can only assume that this was me feeling the contractions as the baby moved down on his own because when I was reexamined upon the midwifes return from her break, she encountered the baby's head. I couldn't believe my ears, this labour had suddenly gone from doing nothing to everything happening. I was so pleased because I was worried it would go to a c-section, which was not what I wanted. We had a few trial pushes and then waited 40 minutes for the epidural to wear off some more.

The pushing stage was surreal, sometimes I couldn't feel the contractions and pleaded with the midwife to tell me when to push. She was brilliant and I don't think I will ever forget her. If things ever got a little scary, she never let on and remained completely calm. It was all hands on with my mum, Caroline and the midwife all helping me to push. I wish I could have seen what was happening, but then maybe that would have stressed me out. The cord around the neck was my worst fear throughout pregnancy and when it turned into reality I became a little hysterical. I was told to stop pushing and that is easier said than done! and the cutting of the cord seemed like a life time. When Caroline started to cry I feared the worst, but hearing his tender cry after I pushed his body put turned my tears into happy tears. Watching the medical staff clearing his air ways was awful, it looked such a painful procedure. Hearing his hearty cry afterwards made me feel over the moon.

Emma holding Evan for the first time

I don't remember much after that, I was absolutely drained physically and emotionally. It was a long time before I was able to hold my son and I really wanted us to bond straight away. When I finally held him for the first time, I was besotted, it was all worth it.

Things I will never forget... The relief I felt inside when the placenta was delivered, it felt like I had just lost a couple of stone. Being sick, I was sick several times and managed to do so on everyone including the machine that I was hooked up to! The feeling of complete happiness I felt when I held my son for the first time. The amazing people that were with me throughout my delivery and hospital care. If only I could have the same people there for number two!

Emma